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Sunday, October 22, 2006

there comes a point in time where your mask starts disintegrating.

You act strong all the time but suddenly, you feel so weak inside and you want someone to come over and comfort you. At the same time, you're unwilling to reveal yourself from behind that facade of strength because that's what keeps you going "strong"...the irony of it. You say "nothing's wrong" but is that the truth or just a diversion from your fear of weakness? When will you learn to let go...?

the paint starts peeling off and your soul's left naked and vulnerable.

At this point in time, you're vulnearable to anyone who shows concern to you. You're waiting for them to show more than superficial civility and take it to the next level by offering you a shoulder to cry on before the first teardrop falls. but it never comes. you wait until you've given up hope...and they ask you why you have lost your faith...

without your mask, you're trapped as well.

you've trapped yourself behind that mask but once it's been taken off, you're trapped in that bubble of insecurity. Are we ever really free? You wait and you wait, until you're numb from the cold of the fall and the shattered pieces of your heart mingled with your dreams geld into a mess of intangible pain-something that exists but cannot be resolved. It'll take time before it melts again, you reassure yourself but what if the sun never shines on you again?

where do broken hearts go?

that's a good question.

The last time I said I had prepared myself to say goodbye to those around me, I never meant for us to say goodbye but suddenly, our goodbyes have to be said. It's unfair-to me. I never meant for it to turn out like this. Now, I don't have to say goodbye to them anymore, I have to say goodbye to everyone and you...nothing's been settled yet but you and i both know that this time, it's more real than ever...I don't know if you know this already or if you've noticed but saying goodbyes are never easy, especially when the magic's been holding your mask together.

enigmatic-

quirks at work blogged @ 11:48 am